Echoes Of Kind Acts

I woke up with a thought: "Every thing that happens to us, defines who we are". Okay, sure, it's not the most original thought ever. In fact, it is just school science; every action has an equal and opposite reaction, if you get into a bath and you're fat, all the water will come out. Things like that.

But I lie. This wasn't what I awoke to. Instead, I woke to a memory. Asking a girl called Bethany out back in year two, or year three, or year four. Anyway, the year wasn't important, only that I asked her out and she said, as nicely as possible, no.

I'm not sure why I was thinking that, perhaps some remnants of a long forgotten dream, but that memory led to the thought that I originally said was what I woke to. Because maybe her denial of a date back when I was seven/eight, is what makes me nervous speaking to girls.

Which means that one little sentence, over ten years ago, is still affecting me now. My mind reels.

What if she had said yes? Let's say that we went on whatever classified as a date back when I couldn't drink. We dated for a bit. Maybe we broke it off when we left for secondary school, but I found new girlfriends, better girlfriends. I'd hang around with them, and their friends, and I'd not really ever speak to the people I'm friends with now.

I might never have gone to college because maybe her family would offer me a job. Maybe I'd get her pregnant. Perhaps I do go, but study different subjects. Maybe I'm more interested in Maths now. I was always good at it, just never had the passion. Maybe I go on to study it at University.

And, in my waking hours, I come to the conclusion that if I had got that one date, I'd be on the road to accountancy right now. I wouldn't even be writing this.

So this thought festered, like thoughts occasionally do. It stuck roots into the core of my brain and it grew, wild and untamed.

In the shower, I wondered what other seemingly insignificant events have shaped my life. If I had gone to that work colleague's party, would I have made friends with different people from work? Hung out with them more?

What if all the times I said yes, I had said no? Surely I just couldn't be the same person that I am now. I would have stayed home when I could've met new people, danced with old people and drank way too much alcohol.

What about vice versa, if I had said yes instead of no? How would going to those places, drinking that drink, kissing that girl, taking those drugs, doing that homework change my life or change who I am now?

Whilst I was dressing (and listening to "Don't Want To Miss A Thing" on the radio), it occurred to me that I'd have to have a list of every single decision and event in my entire life to even get close to understanding the reasons behind why I'm here right now.

And whilst I was on the way to buy a sandwich, as if life has some ultimate goal, I witnessed a small act of cruelty that pushed me into the conclusion of this thought. A man running for a bus and another, more idiotic, man sticking his foot out to trip him was what got me thinking about other people's lives.

Small decisions affect my life then they must also affect others. The simple act of sticking a foot out and almost tripping a man could echo forever. That man would be put into a bad mood, who wouldn't, and maybe he'd snap at an employee. He may not work as hard as he could do, setting himself behind on a deadline at the end of the week. He could be fired. Lose his house. Commit suicide.

Yes, this is extreme, but it is only to try and get across the damage that something so small can do. Even when I was buying the last tuna sandwich, I worried that maybe somebody would be denied their favourite sandwich. Maybe that would put them in a grumpy mood and they'd fight with their boyfriend. Maybe. It could happen.

Really, it may seem like such a simple statement to say that what we are doing right now with have ripple effects for the rest of our lives, but I think as people we have a capacity to hide the sheer scope from ourselves. Even the simplest gesture can completely rewrite the way history is going. Not just for ourselves but for people we meet and people we will never come in contact with in our lives.

The last dying breath of the thought was the idea that if cruel acts affected people badly, good acts must brighten the world a little. They could echo through people's lives, make people happier and more likely to be kind to others, and the cycle would continue.

I was in the queue when this last thought struck. I picked up a large bar of chocolate and every person I met that day, I offered a piece to.

It may sound lame, or a little naive, but I feel that my simple act will change the world. At least for today.

:D

http://genesis.deviantart.com/art/Kindness-49353900