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This time of year everyone seems to be giving the same things up. Smoking, chocolate, pizza; the list goes on endlessly and repetitively. People want to breathe better or be slimmer, healthier versions of themselves.
Well I'm here to say they shouldn't! Well, they should, but why are they waiting till Easter to sort out their smoking habit? You want to quit smoking, then stop lighting up those little white sticks and start chewing gum or something.
Lent should be a time for experimentation. You only have to give up something for forty days and so this something should be more interesting than booze, smoke and lard. You should be seeing how different your life would be without one of the staples that currently defines it.
In honour of this, I have provided a list of possible ideas below. You may not choose something from the list itself, but I hope that it sparks ideas for something in your own life that it would be interesting to live without.
Air
Okay, sure, this may not be something you want to give up entirely. But we are living in a current state of fear thanks to global warming and it would be selfish to believe that the carbon dioxide you emit has nothing to do with it.
So stop breathing so much! Take one breath where you would have once taken two. Then, after forty days, write Al Gore a letter to tell him of your heroic effort towards saving the planet. Maybe he'll give you a badge.
Religion/Atheism
If you believe in God, stop now. He won't mind that you have drifted off for forty days. Besides, it is his holiday anyway. Try and live life without the pressure of religion on your back. Break a few commandments. Disrespect your father. Do the unthinkable with your neighbour's wife.
However, if you are currently living the carefree life of an atheist, start going to church. Confess all your sinful ways and sing a few hymns. Let God into your life and see whether it takes you on a magical journey.
Your strong hand
Right-handed? Start using your left. Also, vice versa. Ignore the people that think you're a bit thick because your handwriting is rubbish. They're just jealous.
Language
Mimes have got the right idea. People don't need fancy words to tell each other what they want or what they feel. Hand gestures and invisible walls can tell us all we need to know.
This may also be a good time to go travelling. Without the burden of learning foreign words, you'll be a huge hit in France, Spain or whether else you decide to go. Just remember, in Portugal the sign used to mean "ROCK!" here instead means that you slept with the person's wife. (True story)
Giving Up
That's right. Give up whatever you've given up in the past. Spent the last four years not smoking? Then puff away to your heart's content for the next forty days. On a diet? Start gulping down those greasy chips and butter soup. It'll be good for you in the long run.
Hope this list has helped you and changed your life for the better.
:D
Well I'm here to say they shouldn't! Well, they should, but why are they waiting till Easter to sort out their smoking habit? You want to quit smoking, then stop lighting up those little white sticks and start chewing gum or something.
Lent should be a time for experimentation. You only have to give up something for forty days and so this something should be more interesting than booze, smoke and lard. You should be seeing how different your life would be without one of the staples that currently defines it.
In honour of this, I have provided a list of possible ideas below. You may not choose something from the list itself, but I hope that it sparks ideas for something in your own life that it would be interesting to live without.
Air
Okay, sure, this may not be something you want to give up entirely. But we are living in a current state of fear thanks to global warming and it would be selfish to believe that the carbon dioxide you emit has nothing to do with it.
So stop breathing so much! Take one breath where you would have once taken two. Then, after forty days, write Al Gore a letter to tell him of your heroic effort towards saving the planet. Maybe he'll give you a badge.
Religion/Atheism
If you believe in God, stop now. He won't mind that you have drifted off for forty days. Besides, it is his holiday anyway. Try and live life without the pressure of religion on your back. Break a few commandments. Disrespect your father. Do the unthinkable with your neighbour's wife.
However, if you are currently living the carefree life of an atheist, start going to church. Confess all your sinful ways and sing a few hymns. Let God into your life and see whether it takes you on a magical journey.
Your strong hand
Right-handed? Start using your left. Also, vice versa. Ignore the people that think you're a bit thick because your handwriting is rubbish. They're just jealous.
Language
Mimes have got the right idea. People don't need fancy words to tell each other what they want or what they feel. Hand gestures and invisible walls can tell us all we need to know.
This may also be a good time to go travelling. Without the burden of learning foreign words, you'll be a huge hit in France, Spain or whether else you decide to go. Just remember, in Portugal the sign used to mean "ROCK!" here instead means that you slept with the person's wife. (True story)
Giving Up
That's right. Give up whatever you've given up in the past. Spent the last four years not smoking? Then puff away to your heart's content for the next forty days. On a diet? Start gulping down those greasy chips and butter soup. It'll be good for you in the long run.
Hope this list has helped you and changed your life for the better.
:D
1 comment:
When you suggest taking the step of disrespecting your father bear in mind that it might lead to a reduction in the amount of carbon dioxide you might release into the atmosphere, after all .. its hard to breath 6ft Under the ground !!!
P.S. When did people start crewing gum ? When I learnt English you crewed boats and chewed gum !
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